The Science of Falling in Love


It’s been seven years since I fell in love with Mr M. We do have the internet and to thank for our introduction to one another.  Seven days into meeting my now husband we had our first ever photo taken together on our second date at the Natural History Museum Ice Rink in November 2008.  This was one of my favourite days ever, we had so much fun.


I consider myself to be a romantic at heart  and I am fascinated with the science and psychology of attraction. For those of us who are already in love or currently falling in love (ahhh sweet) a significant number of chemical reactions are involved in instigating lust, attraction, attachment, and love between couples.


Lust is said to be the initial stage of getting involved with love and is driven by the sex hormones testosterone and oestrogen.


Attraction is the amazing time when you are truly love-struck and can think of little else. There are neurotransmitters involved in this stage like Adrenaline which causes the heart to beat faster and stronger. Dopamine is a chemical that stimulates the feeling of pleasure within the body. Serotonin has been found as one of the important chemicals involved for exciting the feeling of love. It basically diverts your mind and bounds you to think about your lover and nothing else.  This phase is said to be one of the beautiful moments to experience.  This is the phase when a person actually starts to feel the love. Similarly, oxytocin also known as the cuddle hormone helps cement the bond and is also released between a mother and an infant during the time of birth. It’s such a sensitive hormone that it automatically signals the breast to release the milk upon the baby’s sound or touch.


Attachment is the bond that keeps couples together long enough for them to go on and start a family.  The theory goes that the more sex a couple has, the deeper their bond becomes, some may not agree with that but there you go it’s a theory.  Vasopressin is another important hormone in the long-term commitment stage.

There are some rare instances however like that of my own parents who married as strangers, only met a few hours before their wedding day?? and have just celebrated there 50th Golden Wedding Anniversary. What a gamble to take (madness if you ask me) but there you go some things are meant to be. Well done you crazy kids!


Whatever your feelings are on the subject of love I think it is is one of the greatest feelings of our lives. It is quite true about the saying “love is blind” because you never know when your brain will encounter it.  So the next time you look at your partner, soul mate, best friend, or pain in the ****  … just think about the chemical cocktail that went through your brain to secure the relationship you have.

In the words of Lord Tennyson  “Tis Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”.

Much Love